A good moment

My baby.  He's a sweety.  For real.  He makes the cutest tongue-clicking noise while he stares at you when he's hungry.  I love it.  I love him.

I can say that at this very moment without the slightest bit of forcing it out because he's laying on the floor.  And has been... for over 20 minutes. 

This is a first. 

I held him a lot this past month, and he's seemed to come to expect it. 

This drives me nuts.  I'm not a holder.  Never have been.  My kids got held plenty, but they got put down even more plenty, and they're very independent and confident in being by themselves because of it.

My sweetness has now fallen asleep on his playmat.  By himself.  As in, without me holding him. 

I don't feel guilty about this.  This is a good thing and I find the tightness in my chest easing a little bit because of it. 

*sigh*  <<<< A big one.  More like, a deep breath of relief.  If only for this very moment. 

I know there are going to be more stressful moments, and even stressful days.  But, man, I'm so glad there are going to be good ones, too.  :) 

I feel very fortunate at the moment - I have good friends.  Friends who have cared enough to offer advice and help and words of comfort and encouragement.  I know this is the Lord's hand in my life.  I feel very blessed to be able to see good times ahead, even if I needed reminders from others that they would come.  I'm thankful for the family that's been there for me, too.  I'm thankful my two year old still insists on sitting in the same spot I'm sitting in order to sit "by" me.  I'm glad he's still my little buddy even though he has to share.  I'm glad he's happy to share.  :)

I have to make note of the good things and the bad things, if you haven't noticed.  I'm an open book.  Ask me how I'm doing and I'll tell ya.  It's how I work through things; by acknowledging them, by facing them, by verbalizing them, by letting them go if needed. 

That's how I roll.  ;)