Hard Happens

The other day, I found myself praying for a certain situation to be avoided for one of my children.  They ended up having to face the situation, anyway.  My prayer wasn't answered.  When I brought that to Heavenly Father, He promptly reminded me that He did one better.  He allowed my child to not only gain some experience and wisdom from facing said situation but also allowed them to see that they had what it takes to get through something like that.  It gave them the opportunity to listen to the wisdom and experience of their mother and rely on me for support.  They came through triumphant and saw that they were able to handle it, after all.  They now have the opportunity to use that experience as a tool for dealing with things like this in the future.  I'm glad my prayer wasn't answered.  Shame on me for wanting a hard-free life for my child.

Life is going to have hard parts.  That's reality.  People these days are so busy trying to sugar-coat everything and hand out participation trophies for everything else, it's just plain ridiculous.  Instead of being a support to those who are struggling when things are hard, we're trying to make things not hard, anymore.  We can't do that.  Like, literally, it would be impossible to even try.  Hard things are going to happen.  Instead of trying to make it easy for everyone, let's teach our kids how to handle the hard and even be a help to them and others when the hard inevitably happens.  Because it's going to happen whether we like it or not.  Life's not always going to be fair.  Sometimes you're going to lose.  Sometimes people die.  Sometimes you get fired.  Sometimes people you love get sick.  Sometimes you do something stupid and have to own it and face the consequences.  Sometimes people will get something that you want but can't have. And, yes, sometimes someone is going to say something you don't like or agree with.  It might make you angry.  It might make you feel guilty.  It might be downright offensive.  But, dude.  How you deal with that is on YOU.  People shouldn't be stopped from speaking their mind or living their life because something they say or do might not jive with 100% of the population.  I guarantee that is never going to happen.  (I am NOT saying it's ok to be purposely offensive.  Society has just made it so it's hard to say ANYTHING or BE anything or DO anything or even CELEBRATE anything.)

I made a decision a while, ago, that if it's not positive or uplifting, it doesn't need to be said (or written about or posted on social media).  It's actually been quite refreshing, but at the same time, I find myself worried I might say the wrong thing, anyway.  I strongly dislike that I have to watch what I say, regardless of how positive I'm trying to keep it, all because it might offend someone.  I struggle with the whole, "let's make sure everyone's ok" crap.  Whether or not someone is offended or "ok" is their responsibility.  Not mine.  Not anyone else's.  I'm tired of feeling censored.  I'm not saying go out and say or write or do offensive things, but I'm tired of feeling like I can't write or say anything because it might hurt someone's feelings, no matter what it is.  I'm all for being compassionate and not going out of my way to hurt someone's feelings, but we simply cannot make every situation peachy so no one ever feels sad or left out or offended.

Not every situation is going to include all people.  That's impossible.  Not every holiday is for every person to celebrate.  People are always going to have differing opinions and life situations.  Sometimes things just aren't going to be fair.  THAT'S LIFE.  I'm tired of society trying to make everything ok for everyone.  If someone's doing something wrong or something they're not supposed to be doing, they forfeit their right to be treated like they're not.  If someone's having a hard time with a particular thing or situation due to no fault of their own, that does suck.  I have a hug and a listening ear for you, but life does just suck, sometimes.  We all have to deal with it and embrace the not-sucky parts and be there for each other when it does.  Because it will.  We can't change that.  We can only change how we deal.

This has been bothering me for some time.  Someone is likely going to disagree with this.  And you know what? Ok.  I am not out to offend anyone.  I'm still going to do my best to be uber aware of what comes out of my mouth.  I truly do like being positive.  I am still very thankful to the person who indirectly helped me realize I needed to make this change.  But, I needed to say this.  It feels good to get it out.  And I daresay someone probably needed to hear it.  Not my call, I know.  But the truth hurts, y'all.  And this is my blog and I have the freedom of speech.  So, there.